The Tom Zone QotD; in the Lauri Zone
Have you ever been in a situation where it was inappropriate to laugh, but you couldn't help yourself?
I was seated on a jury for a man who was in an auto accident. He was rear ended by another man who looked down at a map on his car seat and didn't look up in time. Our guy was in a neck brace and was suing the driver's company for 2 million dollars. His lawyer went on and on and on for hours about this guy's entire medical history. I mean, every doctor's appointment the dude had ever been to, up to 15 years BEFORE the car accident.
I was on the jury with a couple of automotive engineers, so you can imagine the senses of humor to begin with.
We were drawing Energizer Bunnies on our notepads and just being silly about this lawyer's longwindedness.
The breaking point was..after two days, several straight hours of listening to this guy's blahbedy blahbedy, he begins talking about a Dr.'s appointment that the plaintiff had scheduled because he was suffering from "painful gas".
Oh. No.
We were on a jury. We were acting serious, dignified, concentrated on getting to the justice of the entire matter. "Painful gas". I could feel the guy next to me....his chair was shaking with laughter. I could not...could NOT laugh in a courtroom. I bit the inside of my cheeks until they bled.
I didn't laugh, but I know darn well we didn't fool anybody.
After the trial was over, and the plaintiff was awarded only what the insurance company would pay (a private detective had caught him, on camera, carrying a 40 pound car jack with one hand while still wearing the neck brace), the serious, dignified, stern judge burst into our jury room, whipped off his robes to reveal a Three Stooges neck tie, and announced "I won a pizza! I bet the bailiff that you wouldn't give the guy over 250,000!".
Hee. Good times.
Comments
Then again, if the judge had a Stooges necktie, he probably would've joined us. (And I say "us," because if I'd been there, you damn sure would've laughed, too--I'd have seen to it!)
That was $249,999.95 more than he deserved, the gold-digging bastard.
I'm afraid I wouldn't have been able to keep a straight face, either, especially if the guy beside me was sniggering, too.
I hate people, in general. There are individuals I do love! ;)
That's the funniest courtroom story yet!
And TOTALLY beats the time I sat watching a guy sue his urologist for negligence in treating testicular torsion.
Let's all say it together now, shall we?
".......Testicular Torsion......"
Now, don't all us females feel better? :)
We were drawing Energizer Bunnies on our notepads and just being silly about this lawyer's longwindedness. This is SO funny!!!!!
Hahaha! My brother and I *lost it* in church at my cousin's wedding. We had studied our butts off for a test we were having later that day at the auto mechanic school we were attending. This happened to be a test on batteries. I think the wedding was Greek...anyway, they put these round head thingies on my cousin and soon to be hubby which were joined by a string (I was thinking -*jumper cables*!) and right then my brother turned to me and said- "Don't forget the positive post is largest"...We started giggling so hard that we shook the church pew (trying to hold it in) and had the bridesmaids giggling, too. We could NOT help it! b/t/w...sounded like a cool judge- I'm glad I wasn't setting next to the guy who was laughing- omg!
I remember once a zillion years ago we had a visiting preacher in our church and my cousin and I sat right up in the front row. I have NO idea what was so funny, now, but we made ourselves sick laughing through the whole sermon, whilst trying to hold it in.
I am sure that guy LOVED us. :P
my kids were young.
Ashlee was probably 4 years old. So we walk sadly up to the casket and Ashlee hollers "Why is he wearing CLOTHES?"
***Snort*** I lost it at that point. Our pastor pointed out that since he was lying down she was probably expecting pajamas. Oh, I hadn't thought of that. :P
Adam was 6 years old and he kept saying "He's breathing!" and running over to the casket to check on Great Grandpa.
It's impossible to be somber with kids around.
Oh! Imagine if you'd had Kramer and George on either side of you!!!
*giggles and runs*
LOL! In the bathroom?!?!
It so happens that this cousin has a brother that laughs at funerals. He laughed at his own father's funeral and his brother and sisters were pissed at him. He couldn't help it, though, that's just how he gets thru them. He was hurting just as bad as the rest of the family.
At his funeral, I realized that the lipstick they'd put on him perfectly matched his tie--this hideous 1980's mauve-pink. I lost it, hysterical hyena giggling. Since then they often make me wait in the church bathroom at funerals.
Haha! That is funny. At least you don't have to stay in the funeral home bathroom. *shudders*. My cousin is one to make morbid jokes at funerals and then laugh nervously. My aunt started apologizing for him, but there was only one aunt there, who can be a bit snub, that even paid attention to it. He would've said something about the tie and lipstick, I just know it. The church bathrooms would've been tied up for a few hours! LOL
I can't stop laughing once I get tickled- I end up with big tears rolling. Laughter IS contagious, and I think I'm allergic!
I can see you and me ending up on the same jury and trying to explain why we can't be on the case together. I can see the judge's face, now. Not just the laughing part- you aren't suppose to know anyone else on the jury. Does Vox count? Or CO (couldn't you imagine explaining to the judge what CO was--"koot leetle animals- Squee!"
"LOCK 'EM UP, BAILIFF!"
I'll bet the spirit of the kid you were admiring the lipstick on was prodding the funnybone in your head to get you to crack up! He probably felt the same way!
When my cousin died in the hospital he looked so ...well, just like he was sleeping. By the time they got him into a casket in the funeral parlor I couldn't even go over and look at him. He looked so .....waxlike, mannequin-like. Ick.
It took me a long time to be able to walk up to him there.
Oooooh!...THOSE! ;)